Seller’s Remorse: Why It’s Common, And What You Can Do About It

May 15th, 2017

Selling your home is a monumental step in your life, and it’s perfectly normal to feel sadness or experience fear during the process. If you think you’re overreacting because you feel sad or are having second thoughts, you’re not, and you’re certainly not the only one who’s felt that way. Seller’s remorse is actually very common.

Your home is a big part of your life. It’s probably the largest investment you’ve ever made, and it’s the setting where a lot of your fondest memories took place. When you look at your home you don’t see walls and carpet, you see your life played back like a movie. You see laughter, love, and a lot of firsts. Those memories are tied to your home, so it’s normal to feel like you’re saying goodbye to them when you say goodbye to your home.

How to Move On

Of course, you’re not really saying goodbye to your memories. You’ll remember them forever, and chances are you have plenty of pictures. So, how do you move on from a home that has been more than just a house? It’s not always easy, but it’s possible. First things first, let yourself feel how you feel. One of the worst things you can do when feeling sad about leaving is to bottle up or ignore your emotions. Let yourself mourn the loss of your home. It’s alright to be sad. Tell yourself that. Remember all the great moments you and your family had, and be thankful that you had such a wonderful home as the setting for those great times. Then, say goodbye in a way that honors your life in the house and helps you feel a little bit of joy in the process. You can throw a party to say farewell, recreate fond memories in honor of the originals, or have a family night where everyone gets to pick one of their favorite “at home” activities to do. Celebrate the house as you say goodbye.

Take a Step Back
After you’ve let yourself feel the sadness and fear that naturally comes with the decision to sell, step back from those emotions and look at the reality of the situation. Yes, you love your home and it provided you with a lot of amazing memories, but there’s a reason you decided to sell. Is the house too small? Do you need a bigger backyard for the kids to run around in? Do you need more bedrooms so your family can grow? Do you need another bathroom so getting ready in the morning becomes less chaotic? These are real issues that won’t be solved if you don’t move. You can love your home and still need to leave it behind. It was perfect for you for a time, but it’s simply not anymore. Staying because you have fond memories, or feel an attachment to it, isn’t the best path for you.

Focus on the Future
You can’t live in the past forever. It’s time to move forward. Focus your time and energy on your new home. Walk through it as a family and talk about all the wonderful memories you’ll create there. Focus on the reasons it’s better for your day-to-day life. Maybe it’s bigger or has that bathroom you wanted. Maybe it’s got a yard that will fit a swing set for the kids and a garden for you. Maybe it’s closer to work or your favorite restaurants or stores. Maybe it has a huge kitchen that you and your family can make breakfast in together. Focus on what you’re gaining, not what you’re losing. Explore the neighborhood to find small treasures like a great coffee shop or a yoga studio that will make life in your new home even better. Celebrate the new house and all it has to offer, both the large and the small.

You’re Not Alone
No matter what your exact emotions, know that you’re not alone. Most people get sad when they sell their home because you’re not selling an object, you’re selling something that had a big impact on your life, something that felt like it was a part of you. That takes time to adjust to and to accept.

If you haven’t found your new home yet, please contact us. We’d love to help you find the house that will make selling your old home just a little easier.

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